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I know that he's not "doing" anything to me, but it feels like he is, because I feel betrayed. More so because of the lying than the cheating. I feel devalued, used and rejected simultaneously, humored, disrespected, not trusted, humiliated, talked at. I feel like a fool. A part of me is torn because one minute I'm grieving the loss of the person then the next minute I'm grieving the loss of the last 10 years of my life.
And I'm terrified to boot. And you're right, he doesn't want to look at his behavior or improve himself at all. It really is torture for him to talk about anything.
He wants a one sided conversation that he doesn't have to feel a response to, as in. Your actions cause me to feel fear. Fear of not knowing if my life is safe or that it's going to change. Fear that when I'm not around you're not considering me in the equation. Fear that I can no longer undress with the lights on because I feel so bad and know that you no longer want me or that you never really did, that this was all just a really sick agonizing joke.
And you're right again about "no matter who he's cheating with. Thank you for taking the time to comment, I think you just explained the writing on the wall clearly. Sweet swingers wants adult dating good fuck.Woman looking real sex Bledsoe
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