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Added: Sabrina Hulme - Date: 26.11.2021 21:28 - Views: 25894 - Clicks: 2555

I was in high school when Sex and the City premiered, and like many women of my generation and the generations that followed, that show taught me a lot about sex. I knew that gay men engaged in it, but I held on to some pretty old-school notions when it came to why straight women would do it. Whoever heard of Mrs. Up-the-Butt might reside. The experience was, for lack of a better word, awful.

But on top of the physical discomfort, I also felt ashamed. It was humiliating that this was what he wanted and humiliating that I consented. What did this say about me? What other so-called deviant things would I consent to in the name of love?

But then something happened in my early thirties. Perhaps it was the confidence that came with age and sexual experience, but I found myself having anal sex with someone I was dating and loving it. Really loving it.

But there was still shame—this time about enjoying anal, rather than just engaging in it. It went back to what liking anal sex said about me as a woman.

Was I dirty? Had I been dropped on my head as and this was the outcome of it, manifested decades later? Though up to 25 percent of heterosexual men and women have tried anal sex, the taboo around it is often louder than the praise.

But, sadly, it does not. There are plenty of reasons a woman might feel guilty about enjoying it. She is simply making a decision for herself that she is interested in having better sex. And despite the alarmism, women who have anal are slowly but surely making their way into mainstream narratives. With this in mind, I have been suggesting it more on my own accord to get more comfortable with the fact that I like it. I wanted to be the one who initiated it, thereby owning both the act and the fact that I enjoyed it. Now I know how ridiculous a notion that is.

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