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You already know the answer to that. I am starting to feel you be making stuff up. This is the first I've heard about a daughter. Maybe stbx ran out in the AM for milk or whatever but she thought to bring the 4 year old with her. Regarding the AM time, maybe she was in the bathrom or basement. I find it hard to believe someone would just take off at AM. And it happened 3 or 4 times? Also, a 10 year old CAN be left for short periods of time. Please don't say unfortunately you live in Mass because the Mass judges readily change the custody and give to the father's as well.
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Employers want to that you are doing something if you are not working. If you are not volunteering thats ok it is not too late to find some volunteer work.
Also while you are out there volunteering you make contacts that just land you that job. I know that it is hard to listen to someone give you advice about job hunting. I know you are doing everything you can. It is a tough situation that are in right now.
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