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Dating can be hard, especially if you and your friend like the same person. There are plenty of ways to navigate the situation without losing a friend, and sometimes without even having to try to lose feelings for your crush.
Here are eight ways to handle having a crush on the same person as your friend. Although a lot of people try to get rid of the feelings and the fact that they have a shared crush with their friend instead of dealing with the issue in a conscious way. The conversation might not be comfortable, but it could lead to some productive discussions about how to move forward. Although it might not be easy, you might want to take some time to reflect on how you really feel about the mutual crush and how it may be impacting your friendship.
And you may want to take time to take in your friend's perspective and feelings, too. You'll also want to avoid "calling dibs," as asserting ownership over a person isn't healthy or fair. She suggests being open about your feelings and to avoid feeling shameful for liking someone that your friend also likes. Your friend? Is there some historical reason you feel jealous and fearful?
Jealousy tends to make people lash out, so hedge against that. Sometimes the best thing you can do is to start that conversation. That gets the ball rolling," she added. She said it's not a bad thing to lose a friend if there's a good reason, but this might not necessarily be one. Although this situation can make a friendship even stronger, in some cases, you might want to re-evaluate the friendship's structure and strength. Deciding neither of you or just one of you should pursue your crush isn't always the answer, either.
Some win, some lose, and that's the way life goes. That being said, remember to treat the person you're both crushing on with respect — their feelings shouldn't be treated as a prize to be won.
World globe An icon of the world globe, indicating different international options. Get the Insider App. A leading-edge research firm focused on digital transformation. Shelby Slauer. It can be awkward and stressful when you and your friend are crushing on the same person. In this situation, it's important to be self-aware, communicative, and open with your friend about the mutual crush. It's also important to treat the person you both like with respect, not as a prize to be won. Acknowledge your feelings. Try bringing up the situation with your friend in an open discussion.
Avoid brushing off your feelings or their feelings. Don't ask for permission to pursue a crush and avoid "calling dibs" on someone.
If you feel jealous, try talking about it. Try to view the situation as a way to make the friendship even stronger. But if the mutual crush is causing a major issue, it could also be a good time to honestly re-evaluate your friendship. All in all, try to be a good sport. Friendships Evergreen story.Best friend dating girl i like
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What if I don't like the person my best friend is dating?